Monday, May 31, 2010

"You never stop loving someone; you just learn to live without them.

This situation is always an unfortunate one. It is ideal for 2 people to love each other the same, and at the same pace, but life is never ideal. To get this kind of relationship to work, you need patience! You have to weigh either waiting for him or moving on as options. If your feelings are real, and you choose to hang in there, you must not scare her away with your feelings! If things are meant to work out, you should be great friends before lovers anyway. While you let both your feelings reach equilibrium, you'll find it becomes easier sometimes just to ignore your strong feelings for him and just kick-back and chill with him. It's not always important to impress him, or do nice things for him in a loving way. It may give you hope to know that he can see you in the same light, just not so quickly.

Tough circumstance - being in love with someone who does not feel the same way as you do. It's not a problem - you can fix those, this is almost like "it's raining outside" - just have to deal. Objective advice: If someone doesn't feel the same way as you do - walk off. Don't even give them the privilege of friendship because you'll suck yourself back into the delusion. Do things for yourself, keep busy, bury yourself in work and keep searching for what you really want and need. Don't do what I have done.

It is strange when you’re hurt from rejection, to hear someone say: move on things will be fine. No matter how much you love him, he never loves you back. For all those wondering what went wrong, I can say one thing, just stop wondering say it really aloud "HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU". Only when one stops chasing and pursing someone who doesn't love you, will you open the door to that perfect person who will love you back with the same intensity that you will love him.

Tough one. If we know for a fact there is no hope for a mutual love, then why torture ourselves. Move on. Treat it like a divorce. FORCE yourself to live and keep meeting people. You owe it to yourself to be available for when the right person does come along. Love is like a bus stop, there's always going to be another opportunity for the bus to stop again -- if we are ready for it at the bus stop. Sometimes we don't ever think we could possibly find someone better than that one we are in love with, that doesn't return the love back, but that's not true. We just won't be ready to find it if we are pining for a love that is not healthy or returned. We owe it to ourselves to always know we deserve what's best and healthy. Stop being around that person, if possible. If you can't, then think in your mind about how wonderful it would be to actually find someone special that returns your love. Tell yourself that you deserve it. We can't control love no matter how hard we try. It's just one of those things, but we can choose to love again. Work out, write your thoughts on paper and then shred it but sometimes it helps to get your thoughts out of you, in writing. It's like a release or venting. Then rip it into shreds and flush it or shred it so it can't be found to possibly humiliate you later.

Time. Letting your own grieve and actually being ok with that. Not forcing ourselves to get over someone. Allow your own to feel the hurt, cry, write about it, and listen to sad songs. Soon you will feel so tired from hurting all of the time. You will be ready to move forward. Doing this without contact of the person you love is best. Anyone that will still see you, sleep with you, and spend time with you, knowing they don't love you, and knowing how you feel, is selfish. Everyone deserves more than that. You can't force love out of your heart so don't try, that just hurts worse and you end up lying to yourself. You are human for loving, but you have to love yourself more. I do agree with comments on staying busy, friends and family also help. Casual dating can backfire however, because if the dates don't go well, it will just make you miss the person you love even more. Pray, and remember the good times but learn from the bad. Don't you want, one day, to be truly happy? Life is too short to give up the chance of true love for ourselves. Go out into the world and continue to be the wonderful person that you are. Someone will see this, and love you just as much as you are capable of loving.

You accept yourself as you are, love yourself for who you are, forgive yourself for decisions and actions that have brought you pain, never settle for anything less then what you desire and deserve. Love is all about timing, make yourself the best person you can be both mentally and physically and do it for you, no one else. Once you do that, you will no longer waste your time on man who do not see you for who you are. You will see yourself as a beautiful woman that has so much to offer the right man. But to be able to get over lost love you have to be able to forgive yourself, whether it was your fault or not. You also must make a conscious effort to get him out of your life. Keeping him as a friend will bring only more pain, this is from experience. Let him go, delete his name off your cell phone off your email, put the pictures away. It is your choice to be miserable about the situation, which for the first few months everyone chooses to be sad. But you can also make the choice to be happy, but only YOU can do that. You have one life, why sit there and waste it on a person who can't see all facets of your beauty. Be happy, love yourself, forgive yourself and you will see that that love will radiate and men will be attracted to that. Good men will be attracted to your positive self worth. And that positive self worth gets rid of all the baggage from past relationships that ruin current ones. But this is a choice, a conscious choice to leave the past and be happy and only you can make it. Know one thing, it won’t be easy, but in the end you will have the love you have always desired.

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